I would give my life if you’d listen for just once moment; really listen.

Sep 25, 2009

Of course he’s acting like everything is okay which just infuriates me. It hurts me more to be honest because it feels like he’s ignoring the issues yet again and I’m just supposed to brush it under the rug until it rises it’s ugly head. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m just so hurt by it all that I can’t even approach the subject because it kills me to open up in that manner only to be shut down. I just.. /sigh I really don’t know anymore.

He told me that his biggest fear is losing me– well honestly the direction we’re headed and is inability to want to change is pushing me in that direction. We cannot be his parents. I’m sorry but I just can’t live my life that way. Albeit things are a bit less complicated for us because there are no kids involved and right now I don’t want to involve them. I can’t be responsible for bringing children into this type of environment so as of now, I’m at a loss as to what to do because he refuses to hear, so what do I do now?